Just Lost My Second Dog

Just Lost My Second Dog

by Dave
(Brownstown, MI)

I was around here about a year ago, because I had just lost one of my two dogs to some unknown, unexpected event. Here's the thread - Dog Dealing with Malignant Melanoma.

Well I just lost her sister today, the one mentioned in the thread above who had cancer. Although, she did not die of the cancer mentioned.

Apparently she had an unrelated tumor grow on her spleen which ruptured. This is what the ER vet thinks happened.

This just happened yesterday morning at 1 a.m. ET so I'm still pretty upset about it but part of me coping is telling the story and talking it out. I've done enough crying over the past 2 days to last a lifetime.

Diamond was fine when I went to bed Sunday night. I went to bed probably around 11pm and she was right there next to me in her bed on the floor. She woke myself and my wife up around 1 a.m. breathing short and fast. It was not a pant, it was clearly a problem. I immediately panicked because I started having flashbacks to when I lost my first (Ruby, mentioned in the thread above).

Of course, it's a blizzard out, and nothing plowed, and on good weather it takes 15 mins to get to an ER vet that's open. I sat in the back seat with her all the way there, and she was alive, hanging in there. I told her I loved her and to just keep holding on. Meanwhile I'm in full panic mode, can't breathe, etc. We got her to the vet, and after getting her in the room, a couple minutes later they came out and told me that her heart stopped and asked if i wanted them to do CPR. I said UH YES! What kind of stupid question is that?

So they went back in, and 2 minutes later the doctor came out and said that she has a lot of fluid in her belly and they think she had a tumor rupture on her spleen, and there's no hope, that even if they got her heart beating again, she won't make it. So i opted to let her go. I was devastated.

Later in the day I talked to the oncologist who said that it had nothing to do with the other cancer that she was diagnosed with. This was just something else, that is very hard to catch during exams unless you're looking for it with an ultrasound. And there was never a reason to have an ultrasound on her.

When I lost my first, I took some solace in knowing I had my other baby, and now I am left with nothing and I feel so empty. I feel like getting another would be 'cheating' on them, and I'm just not sure I can deal with the grief of losing another dog in my life. Maybe I'll think differently in a few years but right now I just don't know how I'm going to ever get over this.

These were my first dogs that I got once I moved out of my mom's. I paid for everything, their food, care, health costs, etc. I loved them every day. They were there every day when I came home from work and seeing me off every morning. Today's the first day I had to get up and she wasn't there. It is so hard to accept.

It makes me question everything about life. We are destined to lose everything we love, and then we will also die. So what is the point of loving anything? It really makes you want to build walls. I am just hurt. I miss my kids...they were like my children. I want them back.

I believe that having caught that malignant tumor very early (as mentioned in the thread above), I was able to cure her of that cancer. We acted very fast, and I threw the money at it, had aggressive surgery, and good margins after the surgery. She also had a lymph node removed and there was no spread of the cancer. And, she never showed any signs of it all year, and I had regular checkups. I kept her on the melanoma vaccine and that was it after the surgery. Cost me probably 10,000 last year, but I wouldn't take it back. It probably gave me another 6-9 months with her.

And, she died of something else. If I could have saved her from this I would have spent the money.

I am thankful I got to spend the last moments of their lives with both of them, and tell them that I loved them before they died. It helps knowing that. I just really hope they are waiting for us in death. I so look forward to seeing them again one day.

Dave

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Feb 02, 2014
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Already been a week
by: Dave

I can't believe how fast time continues to move. I think I've been through every emotion this week. I miss my dogs so much. I feel very alone without them.

I have been angry at life, sad, upset, frustrated, etc. I can't do anything around the house without thinking about them. The spring/summer is going to be hard, when I go out to the backyard to clean it up for the last time. When I go for a walk around the neighborhood it's going to be tough.

I guess I need to do these things though. My dogs were smart walkers. If I said turn left, turn right, go straight, they knew what I was saying. They knew to stop on a dime...

I think I had the only labs on the planet that didn't like water lol. They HATED water. If someone had their sprinkler system on they would make me walk them into the street. It was so funny. At all costs they'd avoid that water. They didn't even like walking through puddles.

God I loved my dogs...

That thing you described with the blood vessel tumors, what a horrible sounding way to die. I hope they just got tired and went to sleep and didn't really feel anything other than being tired. I hope there wasn't pain.

Jan 29, 2014
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Just lost my dog
by: Elaine

Hi Dave,

Firstly may I send my condolences on your loss.

I had a similar thing happen with my dog, spent thousands only for him to go six months later to another disease. I hate this dreaded c word.

May you be comforted in the difficult days that lie ahead with many happy memories. I have lost several dogs to cancer and am battling it myself. There are a lot of good people on here who will support you. Once again my condolences on your loss.

Jan 29, 2014
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So sorry for your loss
by: Anonymous

It brings tears to me reading this! I have gone through this twice since 2007 with my Booker and Pappy dog. They both had the same thing happen to them as you did! Booker, July 1996 to May 2007, died suddenly of a tumor on his heart that ruptured and Pappy had tumor ('s) on his liver. The cancer is a very aggressive one and is called Hemangiosarcoma which is a blood vessel cancer. The tumor is formed as a clump of blood vessels and bleed very easily! These tumors are most common on the spleen, liver and heart. They also can occur on the skin. I researched this cancer extensively on the internet. It is a horrid cancer and the vet was right, there was nothing that could have been done. So sad! Somewhere on here you can find my write up on my dog Pappy with the liver cancer(hemangiosarcoma).

I feel for you because like I said it is just horrible to lose your furry family members!

Take care,

Billy n Willy dog.

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